When I was s kid, about the age of my kids now, I thought my parents were in total control. That they knew everything and they knew what they were doing. It wasn’t until I got older that I realized, they may have been steering the ship, but they had only just learned to drive and had no map of where we were going.<\/p>\n
I know this because I’m in the driver’s seat now. School starts in a little over five hours and I’m awake writing because my brain won’t shut up and let me sleep.<\/p>\n
My youngest starts school today. She is nervous and came to our bed in the middle of the night. I am nervous too. She doesn’t know, but I’m scared. I worry how she’ll do. I worry about her riding a bus, and I worry that she’s growing up too fast. She won’t know because I will tell her it’s ok and she will accept that just like all kids do.<\/p>\n
My oldest is growing up so fast. Each year I watch him, holding my breath, as he excels at everything. Today starts a new year. A harder grade. I always wonder, will this be the year he meets adversity? Will this be the year he struggles with something? I know it’s coming, it comes for all of us, and honestly, it’s better to happen now than next year, or the year after. Everything comes easy to him and I love that, but one day he will have to falter. Will I be ready? Will I handle it correctly?<\/p>\n
When I got older I learned that my mom didn’t have control of the ship. She just did the best she could with what was in front of her ….and that’s all I can do. I don’t know what I’m doing, obviously if I did I would be sleeping right now so I could get up in the morning. I do know that I’m scared and excited for what the future holds for my kids, but I kinda wish the future would slow it’s arrival just a little.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
When I was s kid, about the age of my kids now, I thought my parents were in total control. That they knew everything and they knew what they were doing. It wasn’t until I got older that I realized, … Continue reading